Deserve the Greatest

Communication and Relationship Tips

Women and What They Mean; It’s a Trap!

I heard of this thing about women saying completely different things from what they mean. Although this may in fact be common knowledge and we can easily just put it off as, “wmen r hrd 2 undrstnd hur dur”, let’s take a quick internet minute to unravel this so called “complexity” of them.

I heard this story from a Tony Robbin’s talk on YouTube, and he was saying that if a guy was driving with his girl and she needs to go to the bathroom, guess what she’d say. Would she simply say, “I want to go to the restroom”? Apparently not.

Instead, she’ll expect the guy to be the greatest detective in the world and ask her, “Do you want to stop to use the restroom, sweetheart?

Our first instinct (if we indeed don’t need to go) would be to say to her, “No, I don’t need to go” because… well… we don’t need to go! If we did want to use the restroom, we’d stop and we’d use it, giving her the chance to also go.

She’d probably be frustrated that you ended up not asking her, because what we’re supposed to do is ask her.

Yes, ask her if she needs to go after she asked you. It was made a bit more complex than it really should, because she could have just said, “Hey, I need to go to the restroom. Can we stop at the next rest stop?” But of course, that’d be too easy for her Superman.

And so was the scenario from Tony that basically enlightened me like he always does. I’m willing to bet some of my female readers will either agree or tell me that they tell it how it is. In either case, it’s quite alright with me, because the more I understand my woman, the more impressed she’d be.

Oh women...

To end this, I just want to say that women are absolutely not impossible to understand. That is a cop-out many men employ to cover for their lack of initiative to go out and find out that women are basically like us:

  • They feel excited about things like us. If you like Chipotle, so does the girl.
  • They feel sad sometimes. Just like you and me.
  • They can bleed like us.
  • And they want to be happy and live a life of purpose. Just like us guys.

So despite their superior beauty with different body parts, and the fact that they do look at things just a little differently from us, we’re all from the same species. So go eat some Chipotle with one (or whatever is your countries equivalent and pass me some because hunger).

My question for you: Did this same situation ever happened to you (both genders) and had no idea what happened? Let me know below (no account needed).

If you’re looking for a reliable, fast writer for your page, email me at hairo.aguilera@gmail.com.

Sex on the First Date: Don’t Do It

Lol wut? Some of you might be saying right now, “Whoa, this is a sensitive topic for me…”

Oh, never mind. This is the internet. You probably see sexual references on Facebook alone.

But most of the guys (and maybe girls) would probably say, “The sooner I have sex with the person, the better!”

Hold your “horse” there. I know you’re young (no matter how old you are, you’re still young) and want to get some excitement going as soon as possible with her, but here are the reasons why it should be held off, even if you have the opportunity to do it:

  1. Even If She’s Attracted to You, She May Feel Objectified

Some girls would feel objectified after you KISSED her on the first date. Different strokes with different folks. But on the topic of having sex on the first date, about 4 times out of 10, she’d feel like crap.

This is definitely not all the time, because it does depend on the girl. Some girls simply have different values than most, and most than some. It’s how they grew up and what they took from seeing their parents (if any of them stood around).

But if she does feel like she’ll be used, obviously wait. And I’m not implying you’d try to force her into doing it, but some guys also tend to persuade her into doing something she doesn’t feel she’s ready to do on the first date (or even the second) because of her values.

If you happen to persuade her to do it even though she feels she really shouldn’t, then you’d have lost points. Yes, she may have enjoyed the moment, but just like “buyer’s regret”, she’ll find a way to make it seem like it never happened.

And guess what? She’ll pretend YOU never happened. Ouch. Ever call a girl a day later and never hear from her? Yeah…

  1. She’d Want Something More with You

That means she potentially envision more with you, and if you noticed that she has the potential to be girlfriend material, I don’t think you should mess that up. From my experience, women would do anything to hold on to that RARE opportunity that YOU might just be that guy she’d want to be exclusive with. She feels that if she does it with you, you’d lose interest with her FAST because she’s been programmed, through experience, that “guys are hitters and runners”.

We’ve been given a bad label because of Realists-type men (more on that in my future article) never staying around for a relationship because they got what they want. Women hate this because sometimes she’s actually very attracted to the guy. They want to know if he qualifies to be that man who would stick around for the other stuff.

The solution: Withhold sex. The test is, if you can wait to have sex with her, you move up on her list of prospects. You may think, “But I choose who to be with!” I believe that, too, but at the end of the day, if she’s a rare catch that know how to treat people properly, always trying to improve and would know how to love you, you better believe she’s in the same shoes as you when it comes to finding the right person, and she doesn’t want to make a lifelong mistake.

  1. She’ll Feel More and More Desire For You as You Withhold It

Now you’re the one withholding it. Even if SHE wants it, you actually benefit more in the long run if you save it for another day. In fact, this, coupled with a future topic I’ll cover, will create an extraordinary urge to want you so bad, because you’re so freaking rare.

I mean, how many guys would seriously hold sex with an attractive women even if SHE wanted to? Not too many. And when I say that she would be attractive to you, I’m stating how difficult it’d be for you to save taking her to your place for another time.

At the end of the day, use your judgement simply because it really all depends on the context:

Do you really like her, but for some reason you will never see her again (God forbid) so it’s actually recommended to do it with her? Is your belief system the one where sex should be done as soon as possible to determine if she’s the one you want to be exclusive with by how she does it? Are you simply not finding the one, so you don’t care if she feels used as long as you get what you want?

Despite the fact that mileage may vary, most high quality women in general would rather be with one amazing guy than 100 hit and runners.

My question for you: What would you do after the night of the first date is over? Let me know below (no account needed).

If you’re looking for a reliable, fast writer for your page, email me at hairo.aguilera@gmail.com.

My past Story! On the Phone: Great. On Our Date: Terrible

So today, I’m going to tell you a true story that happened many years ago.

I was selling make-up kits on the streets (I didn’t do so well, by the way) with other people when I met this cute girl. I was in a suit when we met. I proceeded to get her number and called her when I got home.

While conversing in different topics as most prospect couples do, she mentioned liking guys in suits…

My thought process was definitely different than it is now, because back then, I didn’t heed that valuable information like I should have. I was probably thinking instead, “I know she like guys in suits, but I bet she’d like me better in my regular clothe hur dur”.

So we went out on our little date which was really just walking around Times Square, for some reason, during the day. That was awful planning and contributed in a large way the outcome I’m going to get to in a moment (if only I can go back in time and give my past self this to read).

It was horrid. She was completely distance from me with no connection and no attraction. I was confused and had all different kinds of thoughts as to why any of my “skillz” wasn’t working (I was trained in the arts of PUA. Go figure). I even texted my best friend and he didn’t know what to do, neither.

Although she never told me (as we never spoke ever again), I’m pretty sure that not only did I not plan effectively for the date and I wasn’t wearing a suit when she clearly told me she gets turned on by guys who wear them (and this was before 50 Shades of Grey!), but I also did many things wrong I had no idea about. As a very good saying goes: “What you don’t know will kill you”. Knowledge is definitely power and learning to be sharp, enthusiastic and an authority figure is key.

In the world of selling, when you find out the ONE motivation for a person to buy and only focus on that one motivation, that’s call “pushing the Hot Button”. That being said, some women will only want guys with a specific preference and will not bother to even look at you if you don’t have it. And I actually qualified with…ehm…I forgot her name.

Question: Was there a time when you went out with a person, but he or she acted completely different than when you guys talked over the phone or Skype? Tell me about it in the comments (no account needed).

If you’re looking for a reliable, fast writer for your page, email me at hairo.aguilera@gmail.com.

Your Eyes and Your Attraction: Using What You Got

You would probably think by the title, “F this. I know how to look into people’s eyes. You’re so basic and just want visitors and attention!”

But that’s not the case, because that same basic knowledge of eye contact has been disintegrating as more and more people are looking at their smart phones and forgetting how to properly interact with our fellow human beings.

Yes, things like eye contact should be naturally executed, but the fact is, we’re not using it to its full intent for the simple fact that the same “natural execution” disintegrate as we become socially impair through (ironically) today’s technology.

Although most people are actually good listeners and do naturally know how to look at the person when they talk, when it comes to being attracted to someone we like, you’re probably doing it wrong.

Yes, when it comes to meeting someone we’re physically attracted to, THAT’S when things can easily get awkward, especially for guys (girls tend to learn and read body language better than guys).

Us guys, we want to show the girl that we want something going on with each other. The fact is: We can! And without saying as much, too…

In movies, lovers do a great job displaying that eye contact is almost all that is needed to get the girl to want you [hard]. Using what we can learn from the best of movies and my knowledge, here’s my four ways to get the most of “talking with your eyes”:

  1. Look When It’s Appropriate

Again, basic but most people talking to an attractive person gets this wrong. When he or she is not talking anymore, stop looking. I will get to when is the right time to look, but either you ask a [good] question to get her talking or look at something else. Chances are, you’d be sharp enough to come up with interesting or exciting questions to get the conversation going, where you can then admire the attractive smiles of the person.

  1. When You’re Talking, You Should Look Elsewhere

Now it’s your turn to shine and to talk about something that would hook them into craving to want to listen to more (good luck). Do you look at the person while you talk? I would advise against that.

You build attraction better if you actually look away then you would by looking at the person as you talk. By doing this, you unconsciously telling the person that you “fine on your own” and that you don’t “need him or her”. The fact is, ALWAYS looking at the person is seen as needy (unless you do it the right way).

  1. Don’t Force a Smile

Counter-intuitive, but powerful. People always say to smile because it shows you’re “happy”, and although it’s true, you can’t fake it, no matter who you are. It has to always be genuine.

So when you look at the other person, it’s actually way better to express what you really feel as you make eye contact. You may think, “but the other person may think you’re negative” but (especially for women) they would appreciate your honest body language.

This, coupled with saying how you currently feel, is MUCH better than asking boring, mundane questions for the simple fact that it gets the other person to immediately know more about you and (as many successful comedians hook their listeners) get them to listen to your passionate “rant” (as long as you’re not actually angry).

  1. (For The Guys) Commence to Stare at Her Pretty Face After She Forms an Attraction to You

This can either go amazing or horribly wrong. By horribly wrong, I mean staring like an idiot and making her feel uncomfortable as she is currently doing something (especially if she’s not interested in you).

But when she’s liking you more and more, all of a sudden looking at her when no one is saying anything is…strangely appealing to her. She likes the attention. You could be looking or talking to anyone else, but you chose to look at her, and if you’re doing it right, she’s looking at you back, and with admiration.

It’s all about creating the initial attraction while portraying with your eyes that you’re a sharp, enthusiastic authority figure that actually listens to the other person. Instead of being that shy individual who’s afraid to look at the person, you’ll be that confident master of communications that people (especially the person you like) will just be attracted to.

Question: Are you too shy to look into people’s eyes? Comment Yes or No down below (no account needed).

If you’re looking for a reliable, fast writer for your page, email me at hairo.aguilera@gmail.com.

Taking Her out on Her First Date; Just Anywhere?

First expression is everything (cliche), as much as I don’t sometimes like it simply because I believe in infinite chances and the fact that if I mess up, I’m done. This is not always true when they see you try your best, is honest, and doing it for her; it’s the thought that counts. But if you’re a jerk, then first expression is extremely important; red flags will be taken seriously the moment you show you’re a douche (unless you apologize immediately).

That being said, planning the first date is very important. You would think this is very common knowledge, but I know for a fact that most guys take a girl out just anywhere, without taking any sort of precaution if anything goes wrong (and that wouldn’t be good for a first expression at all). Despite me saying that it’s the thought that counts, women also don’t want a man who didn’t plan ahead (trust me; I lost a lot of women’s confidence this way).

I mean, she said ‘yes’ when she could be doing a lot of different things (including going out with another guy). That says a lot, so making sure she has a great time is the difference between seeing her again or not (this will even affect you possibly getting into her pants that night!).

In order for her to consider you for the long term (out of the many choices she has), she has to know if you have any kind of leadership and if you have the potential to fill her needs. That’s why it’s important not to screw up.

So where do you take her?

This is why it’s important to plan where to go. Like I said, you wouldn’t just want to take her anywhere. Even going to the movies or to a bar presents risks without precautions. That’s why having as much support, as well as being honest, is the best way to go.

When planning a date, I actually mean calling up the place you’re going to (if applicable) and checking if it’s a green light to even go. What a disaster it would be to find out the place is overly crowded or it happens to be closed.

You can call to ask for a possible reservation or let the manager there know about any specific planning (may not be possible).

Even better, if it’s a place you never really went, check the place out beforehand. You may have just seen it online or said, “It’s from Groupon. It’d be fine”, but pictures can be deceiving and it may actually turn out to not be a place worth going.

Speaking of Groupon, let me share a story: I called this sushi place up I found on the app. Great deal of an abundance sushi, as well as beer, for two people.

Before I go on, just remember that you never need to spend a humongous amount of money for a date when all she cares about is a good time. The amount of money you spend never equals the amount of attraction for you.

I asked the manager if it’d be really crowded and that I would be there at 6 PM. After founding out it’s an OK to go, I arrived 30 minutes before the scheduled meetup to scout the place and meet with the manager, asking him to scan my reservation so my date won’t have to see it. I liked the place and the music was good, so things were going well.

She arrived and we went to the place, ate and enjoyed ourselves, and I “payed for the whole thing”. After that, I took her home and we went on several dates afterwards.

Although I didn’t do it, I could have been honest with her and get some “honesty points” by saying, “Guess what? I actually used Groupon to get a deal for the both of us plus beers, and as a result, I saved money and gave you a good time.”

Most people probably would laugh and think, “But you sounded like you had no money” (even though I payed for the whole thing) and things of that nature, but in fact, I actually did two things that would apply to you:

  1. She has more trust in you for being honest with her.

Honesty is rare to find in a man (not a surprise) so this is a huge plus.

  1. She’ll relate with you. So hard.

You know why most women shop at Marshalls over the brand name stores, even though the mass amount of variety makes finding something a little hard to find? (I used to work at one)

Because of the great deals. Women are masters at finding the most affordable clothing and saving money that can be used for other things (like buying more clothes. Go figure). When they find that you somewhat do the same thing, they’re going to appreciate your intelligence and foresight when it comes to finances and decisions.

Always remember that on the first date, they don’t just want to see if you’re compatible with her: They want to see how much of a leader you’ll be in the relationship.

Question: How casual are you when you’re planning your dates (or anything)? Let me know below! (No account needed).

If you’re looking for a reliable, fast writer for your page, email me at hairo.aguilera@gmail.com.

Money and Relationships; How the Two Really Mash Up!

When people think of money, they probably think of the long hours it takes to make it. Or that it’s never enough. Hard to get. Always getting spent.

There are the few who think quite the opposite; they think there are an abundance of them and that they get rewarded with lots of them every time they do what they love.

Whichever one you think about money, when we take it and mix it with love, what happens?

It’s something definitely worth thinking about when it comes to successful relationships, especially when lack of money (or lack of control of money) gets you stressed out.

Money affects basic, day-to-day living in the relationship

Everything seems like a business, doesn’t it? There are budgets to maintain and it’s very important to know that without any money, no food would be on the table.

I know I know. This is incredibly basic stuff. But the point I’m trying to make, especially in this day and age, is that money is hard to come by and being smart in how to keep and SAVE money is just not optional anymore. One wrong misstep and it could affect the relationship big time, especially when a study shows that more than 60% of Americans wouldn’t have money to deal with unexpected calamities.

Money affects time together with your lover

Some would argue that the point of even being with your lover is simply to be with him or her despite the fact that you work over 80 hours a week. In fact, even 40 hours is a long time. If that’s true, then what’s the point? You might as well marry your job (hold on, before you think I’m bashing the noble notion of coming home from a long day of work and kissing your girl).

I don’t know about you, but when I’m with my girl, I want to spend as much as time with her as possible, because that’s why I’m with her in the first place. I would try to go to as much vacations as possible with her. You must be thinking, “But you need a job to pay for rent and food. You can’t be leeching from her or the government!”

That’s exactly what I thought you would say (or I’m completely wrong). Before I get to that, let me just say one more thing.

Money affects the future of the relationship

So if money affects what we put on the table and how it would affect time with each other, then it would definitely deal with the future of the relationship.

Of course, the future is unpredictable, but what’s dangerous is the fact that people believe that “all will always be well” when it comes to the belief of job security and that their retirement will be well funded. Unfortunately, they’ll be in for a rude awakening.

Pensions don’t exist anymore for most Americans. There, I said it. You need to do your own 401K (or your country’s equivalent) and you cannot mess up, or you basically wasted your time.

I can go on and on, but there’s a book that is a must read on this very important topic to EVERYBODY living on this Earth. I’ll talk more about it towards the end.

But the whole point of this article is to think beyond working a regular job for 30 to 40 years. Most people think that’s the only option, but that is not the case; the schooling system made it seem that way (on purpose).

Let’s connect this to how you can financially have a happy relationship: Think of something you’re good at that you are willing to always improve on. Something that you consider art. And create it as something very valuable that will help or entertain a lot of people who are willing to even PAY for it.

Yes, own a business.

Here’s the awesome part: Own a business with your lover (or your lover can own a separate business).

The idea with a business in terms of how it’ll benefit the relationship is that businesses eventually ALWAYS give the person time freedom because, unlike a job, you do the work ONCE and it’ll forever be of value to people. I hope this article, which I’ll write once, will help many people for many years to come, for example.

The number one reason relationships are always successful is because the two people participate in a fun and exciting activity together (get your mind off the gutter. Sex isn’t the only thing, but it’s very effective). Nothing is more exciting than owning a business that grows, together, that will put food on the table, give you guys more time for each other and secure your future (plus get rid of any overloading debt you may have).

Of course, you can keep working a job, of course, as long as you legit like it. Many people can’t say that, but always think long term.

Tony Robbins, a great mentor and master at helping people get breakthroughs on all areas of life, wrote a book with all the knowledge of billionaires on how the average person (you and me) can have a secure future using the powers of smart investing. To learn more, check out his book: MONEY Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom. I am not making a single dime from this; this is how much I truly believe this will help every person that aspires to have a great life and not let his or her finances get in the way. Access to his audio book can be found on YouTube.

Question for you: Does the thought of money stress you out? Let me know below! (No account needed).

If you’re looking for a reliable writer, email me at hairo.aguilera@gmail.com.

Moving in to Your Lover’s Foreign Country; Should You?

I read horror stories after horror stories of couple from different countries never meeting but have desires to move in with each other.

Jesus Christ!

Whoa. Like, meet the freaking person first and see if he or she is even a fit. Excuse me, I need to go pray.

Oops, lost some readers. Too controversial. Anyways, if you’re planning on marrying the person the moment you meet him or her for the first time, then this read is definitely for you.

If you’re the one doing the moving to go live with the person, you better be prepared to love the country, too. There’s definitely a chance (like with the person) that it may not work out, especially if it’s a third world country (no offense).

No Income? Don’t Even Try It

You better have good income coming in to your U.S bank account through an online business or you shouldn’t even bother. Most people really underestimate how cheap living in a third world country is. Yes, it can be cheap, but if you hardly have any money, then you’d be no different than the natives (again, no offense!). They’ll wonder why you’re dumb enough to move away from a glamorous country (if you’re from the United States, England, Canada, etc).

Don’t expect work there. Just don’t. If you happen to find work there, then it’d be with incredibly low pay and slave work, and I really can’t picture you with that kind of work. You have so much to offer in terms of value, so don’t waste it on slavery (this includes your own country).

The Mosquitoes Are Usually the Big Threats, Not the Elephants (Quite Literally, Depending Where You’re Going!)

It may seem nice to move in to an exotic country (for example) based on visiting it one or two times, but living in the country for more than a month you will start to feel the subtlety. Hard.

You’ll start to notice that not everyone is always happy and supportive. You’ll also notice that the food may not always be great. Or that traveling from one place to another can be tiring and the transportation system isn’t exactly the greatest.

The novelty will just wear off. In other words, just like owning a brand new car, you’ll simply get used to it. You’ll realize how great your own country really is. The only way you’re really like it is if living in a third world country is meant for you.

Before I give a strategy on how you can find out if living in the country with your potential lover is right for you, remember not to put all your eggs in one basket. I’ll discuss that in great lengths here.

You have to make sure he or she is someone you can live with for the rest of your life, lest you horribly regret it. Make sure you guys are a forgiving couple who are willing to work things out over small bullsh*t. I had this problem when I lived with my half-brother: his mom and I got into one conflict, and she never had the balls to work it out (I didn’t know it was serious enough for her to start hating me, at the time). Small monsters grow big, overtime, and people ignore baby monsters, as they’re no threat. But when things became huge, I was the one to pay the price and become homeless, where I was the one to blame.

Something similar can also happen to you, so when you want to move in with [any] person, watch for any communication red flags and if he or she is willing to kill the small monsters with you. You’ll be surprised how very few people would know how.

Save Your Pesitos; You’ll Want to Visit a Lot

I strongly advise vacationing to the country you want to move to for a week. Have a taste of the person (if you catch my drift) and the country and see how you like it. If you do like staying in the country for a week (and you’ll know), proceed to the next step.

Stay for a whole month. By a month (or not), you’ll definitely know if you’d want to move there. By then, you’d experience the subtleties that wasn’t felt when you were just there vacationing; the novelty of the beauty would much or less have worn off. But if after a month, you’d want to come back, then that’s a good sign.

Lastly, come back and stay for three months. This is more of a, “can I live with the person?” than it is if you can live in this country without complaining. While staying for a week and staying for a month, you’re madly in love with the person and probably haven’t seen the negative subtleties yet. But in three months, you will, and this is something you need to make sure of before taking the big step in moving into the country.

If you still feel happy with her and/or the country, then good. But I just need to say that your own country, after telling you all of what I said, is mostly likely better to live with with your lover. Chances are high that if you’re looking for that third world charm, your own country you were raised in actually has somewhat of it, as almost every first world country has a country side (beautiful, I might add).

You should really consider looking into your own country and (mostly for the men) bring the woman from her country to you and save a lot of money. We take for granted things we think are better elsewhere (the government, type of people, prices of things) but in fact, you most likely got it good. All it takes is appreciation and the fact that your lover would love to live where YOU are because it’s a luxury for them (even after the novelty has run out).

Question for you: Are you in a long distance relationship? Let me know below! (No account needed).

If you’re looking for a reliable, fast writer for your page, email me at hairo.aguilera@gmail.com.

Like a Person from Another Country? Got the Cash for It?

As more and more people connect all over the world, chances are pretty good that you’ve spoken to an attractive person with some relatable and interesting profile. Although very few people probably do this, you may have even started a romantic relationship online (even if the person lives over 2,000 miles away!).

Nothing wrong with that. But when is it OK when you guys have yet to meet?

Well, it’s never OK. There are many high quality, attractive people and to talk to them but never having one feel of their skin should be a crime. If you’re going to have a real meaningful relationship with someone who possibly lives in another country, you better be well prepared for what you need to do to get to the end goal, which is to ALWAYS be with the person.

Here are four preparations you need to go from “dating online” to “actually, physically sleeping with the person”:

You Need Your Own Place

This may not be a problem for you, but in this day and age, where just living with a couple of people is efficient (yet frustrating) because of cost of living, it’s more common than you think. To the point where it’s almost impossible to bring anybody over.

Although you may not be able to do so now, think about getting your own place, where you have a lot more freedom on who you can bring over, if you’re serious about getting into any kind of relationship. Although this sounds really basic and doesn’t sound like it applies to online dating, the point I’m making is when your guest does come over from where he or she is coming from, they can stay at your place instead of dealing with hotels. Saves a whole lot of time and money, which you could save when you both go somewhere different.

Also, I’m a big believer in the post-dating phone and Skype conversations, where you take this time to know one another much much better than you would simply messaging. I really hate when I’m not able to do this because other people are in the same room and not be able to do anything intimate (yes, like phone sex).

You Need to Be Financially Stable

Like the last one, this one can’t be done immediately but (obviously) is well worth it in the long run. You would think, “Of course I know that!”, but you’d be very surprise.

I wish love could be “free”, and people do pull of having great relationships with hardly any money, but that’s in the minority. In another minority, you don’t have to be rich, neither, to have a happy relationship.

But you need money, and this goes double if you really like this person and she lives far. Traveling, unfortunately, is expensive. But you need to do it if this person is worth the trip. The plus side is that you get to see a whole new world, which is always good for you.

But aside from traveling to see each other (multiple times, I might add), if you guys ARE meant for each other and want to take the next step, just remember that it’s going to cost money for her to come over to your country (as far as I know, the guys bring the girl to him. Bring on the Feminists!).

This one should be a no-brainer, but with times as tough as this, spending extra because someone lives in another country as oppose to someone who lives local can add up.

You Need to Embrace That the Person May Not Be the One

After plane tickets, hotels, food and other things have been spent when meeting up with the person, it all ends because you guys just aren’t meant for each other. This is definitely a hard reality to face and put a whole other meaning to the phrase, “Great reward comes with great risks.”

Can the risk actually be reduced?

You Need to Meet Multiple People Online (and Off)

It all really comes down to what you want: someone from another country or someone close by. I can actually relate to wanting someone from another country: I love exotic women. Are there exotic women near where I live? You bet, but their “exoticness” wears off when they live here for a while (I live in the city).

Simply put, never put all your eggs in a basket (I talk more about this here), rather it’s dating locally or doing the long distance relationship, because you never know what’ll happen.

Will it be more expensive? Heck yes (unless you talk to other women in the same place and is honest about it with them).

So here’s my question to you: Is being romantically involved with a woman from another country being too bold? Let me know below! (No account needed)

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When a Woman Leaves You; Is It You or Her?

So you talked to this girl and you guys liked each other. Things went well, but then she doesn’t call or text you anymore. When you do call and she happens to pick up, all of a sudden it seems like you’re taking up her time. How did this happen? A while ago, she was calling YOU.

So what gives? Well, she most likely ain’t into you no more.

From my experience, most girls will only be committed to you for a set amount of time (notice the most). Commitment, for both men and women, it’s something that can’t easily be done due to various reasons. You’d have to be the one for them in order for them to want to stay with you. But chances are, something out of our control makes it so that she isn’t interested in you anymore.

So could it be you? Are you the reason she stopped talking to you and is probably talking to another guy?

Maybe. It is a fact that when you don’t fulfill the big needs of a woman, she would most likely look elsewhere for them. Other things include not being passionate and motivated about your future (I talk about that here).

Chances are: She just doesn’t feel it anymore. She probably doesn’t believe that she deserves you; that she deserves a great relationship. Maybe she did meet someone else, despite how great you are. Maybe her future just isn’t compatible with yours.

If you’re into meeting women online and you have yet to meet one of them, despite talking for months, maybe she’s just tired of waiting.

Whatever the reason, it’s time to move on. I know, I’m not the kind of guy to give up, also. But let’s think about it for a second.

If she knew how much of a catch you are, she wouldn’t be leaving you. If that is the case, then (as stated earlier) she doesn’t feel she deserves you; she isn’t intelligent, confident (or sexual) enough to want to be with you. She doesn’t know how valuable you are.

Of course this is assuming you’re not a douchebag. You actually are a catch, who is sharp, an authority figure and is enthusiastic. Why would they stop talking to you, if you know you can provide a lot of value to her.

This is why, in order to find the right one, you need to always talk to women (I actually discuss this here). Because at the end of the day, YOU should choose if you want to leave the relationship or not.

Question: Are you the heart-breaker in most of your relationships? Comment below (no account needed).

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Being in a Fake Relationship: Don’t Kid Yourself

I have a good friend (nice guy, very talkative) and he’s been heart-broken before because of a four year relationship he got out of. His ex-girlfriend cheated on him. As I already knew as the act of “rebounding”, he immediately ask a girl out to be his. Then, like eating Italian one night and eating Chinese the next, he got into a “serious” relationship with another girl and proclaim his “love” to her.

But it all ended way too soon. They finally realize that they weren’t really in love and now time and energy has wasted. To make things worse, he decided to go through his “list of girls” and picked another one to “fall in love with”…

Now, we all know someone like that. We know that it’s one thing to commit and truly love someone, but it’s another to just be in a relationship to fill a “void”. It’s one of the many reasons why the divorce rate is so high, especially in the United States; people get into relationships for the wrong reasons.

So let’s analyze quickly why that is. Psychologically, the reason a person’s unconscious behavior is the way it is is mostly because of the Paradigm, or the embedded habits that not only was developed in childhood, but has always been in the genes for many generations (crazy, I know!).

I already hinted on a person’s childhood. Believe it or not, if a person’s parents raised a child a certain way, it is a huge determinant on how they will grow up. And keeping with the topic of this article, the biggest determinant is if they’ve gotten enough love, growing up.

If the child was constantly being yelled at for very trivial things (or was always exposed to their negativity) and/or one of the parent (usually the father) was not around [often], then that’s the void the person is trying to fill when they try to be in a relationship for the wrong reasons.

As you can tell, this is a humongous topic, but what I’m getting at is this:

Whatever you lack but need, you always go and get it, somehow.

Could be a good thing or a bad thing. If you need food, for example, even the homeless write something on a piece of cardboard and beg for money to get food. People would call that survival.

But if a person need to be in a relationship because it’s not enough that you have yourself, then that’s a problem.

The fact is, when you learn to forgive the past, be willing to change for the better, and realize that you have the most important person already: YOU. Then that “void” will disappear, little by little, and you’ll be ready to be with the second most important person, who would also love him or herself.

Question: After leaving a relationship, do you automatically feel relieved or do you feel empty? Comment below (no account needed).

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