Sex on the First Date: Don’t Do It
Lol wut? Some of you might be saying right now, “Whoa, this is a sensitive topic for me…”
Oh, never mind. This is the internet. You probably see sexual references on Facebook alone.
But most of the guys (and maybe girls) would probably say, “The sooner I have sex with the person, the better!”
Hold your “horse” there. I know you’re young (no matter how old you are, you’re still young) and want to get some excitement going as soon as possible with her, but here are the reasons why it should be held off, even if you have the opportunity to do it:
- Even If She’s Attracted to You, She May Feel Objectified
Some girls would feel objectified after you KISSED her on the first date. Different strokes with different folks. But on the topic of having sex on the first date, about 4 times out of 10, she’d feel like crap.
This is definitely not all the time, because it does depend on the girl. Some girls simply have different values than most, and most than some. It’s how they grew up and what they took from seeing their parents (if any of them stood around).
But if she does feel like she’ll be used, obviously wait. And I’m not implying you’d try to force her into doing it, but some guys also tend to persuade her into doing something she doesn’t feel she’s ready to do on the first date (or even the second) because of her values.
If you happen to persuade her to do it even though she feels she really shouldn’t, then you’d have lost points. Yes, she may have enjoyed the moment, but just like “buyer’s regret”, she’ll find a way to make it seem like it never happened.
And guess what? She’ll pretend YOU never happened. Ouch. Ever call a girl a day later and never hear from her? Yeah…
- She’d Want Something More with You
That means she potentially envision more with you, and if you noticed that she has the potential to be girlfriend material, I don’t think you should mess that up. From my experience, women would do anything to hold on to that RARE opportunity that YOU might just be that guy she’d want to be exclusive with. She feels that if she does it with you, you’d lose interest with her FAST because she’s been programmed, through experience, that “guys are hitters and runners”.
We’ve been given a bad label because of Realists-type men (more on that in my future article) never staying around for a relationship because they got what they want. Women hate this because sometimes she’s actually very attracted to the guy. They want to know if he qualifies to be that man who would stick around for the other stuff.
The solution: Withhold sex. The test is, if you can wait to have sex with her, you move up on her list of prospects. You may think, “But I choose who to be with!” I believe that, too, but at the end of the day, if she’s a rare catch that know how to treat people properly, always trying to improve and would know how to love you, you better believe she’s in the same shoes as you when it comes to finding the right person, and she doesn’t want to make a lifelong mistake.
- She’ll Feel More and More Desire For You as You Withhold It
Now you’re the one withholding it. Even if SHE wants it, you actually benefit more in the long run if you save it for another day. In fact, this, coupled with a future topic I’ll cover, will create an extraordinary urge to want you so bad, because you’re so freaking rare.
I mean, how many guys would seriously hold sex with an attractive women even if SHE wanted to? Not too many. And when I say that she would be attractive to you, I’m stating how difficult it’d be for you to save taking her to your place for another time.
At the end of the day, use your judgement simply because it really all depends on the context:
Do you really like her, but for some reason you will never see her again (God forbid) so it’s actually recommended to do it with her? Is your belief system the one where sex should be done as soon as possible to determine if she’s the one you want to be exclusive with by how she does it? Are you simply not finding the one, so you don’t care if she feels used as long as you get what you want?
Despite the fact that mileage may vary, most high quality women in general would rather be with one amazing guy than 100 hit and runners.
My question for you: What would you do after the night of the first date is over? Let me know below (no account needed).
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